Private Property

love

source: Private Property

Absolutely horrific. I was anxiously awaiting for the movie to get better. But it just progressively got worse and worse. The music is so intensely loud and reminds you of soft p0rn0 music in the worst way possible. Acting was terrible and the storyline was beyond ridiculous and disturbing. This movie had zero redeeming qualities. Benson went down hill in this movie. Her acting was laughable and cheesy. What a disaster of a film. I'm not joking when I say this is the worst movie I've ever seen in my life. Let me summarize... rich attractive female actor, two poor losers stalk her and pretend to be gardeners to get close to her only to attempt to take advantage of her, get her intoxicated and then attempt to off her. Husband comes home and female offs the bad guys. The shortest climactic scene and lousiest acting ever. Don't waste your time. Seriously so so bad.

Its a pretty good movie I thought. A bit left wing. Just a story about a lonely house wife that is too trusting and is brave in the end. Main female character is very good in this role.

Oh man, like the other user said about not having logged in in awhile but had to for this review, I have never reviewed anything on here before but man this film is SO bad lol terrible acting, I laughed every time the cheesy synth stabs came in to create "a mood" haha this plays out like a bad * but with no sex. And now apparently this review has to be at least 600 characters but I'm not sure how else to say you should not watch the movie. Can't even believe Hulu had this as a brick to recommend this? Someone should be required to actually watch these before they "recommend" to anyone, let alone allow to be streamed.

I don't know where to start. Had such high hopes for this movie since we loved Ashley as Hannah in PLL. If this was the best vehicle for her, then I fear her career will be be short lived. The music was awful and the premise of the movie was just pure crap. And the acting? Can you say OVERemote? The guy playing Ed Hogate and the Ben and Oates characters made the whole thing seem like a comedy. Sadly, Ashley couldn't pull off whatever her character was supposed to be. I am thinking that she must have been a * with a totally messed up brain. Two hours of my life I will never get back. Don't waster your time on this turkey.

It was comically awful. The editing was terrible. In an 80-minute movie, we were treated to long stretches of scenes like the protagonist taking out her trash, making the movie feel like the run time was far longer. It was like an. Editing 101 submission. I paused to check the year this film was made because (and not in a good retro way), it looked like it was made in the early 90s at some points. The sound was poorly done, making it hard to hear dialogue at points. Jay Pharoah's character was a joke. Going back to bad directing/editing: one of the longer stretches of his character on screen has his back facing the camera. He's absent for a large part of the movie and his character just comes off as filler. Terrible way to use your star actor. The whole story was a mess. The ending was a mess and rushed. Certain character motivations were unclear or not addressed. So when the ending came, it fell completely flat. A certain character reappears and I laughed because he was so disinterested in everything until that point. It was like a lifetime movie (though that's an insult to many LT movies). Not an entertaining one and not well done even for their standards. A boring, dated (but new), poorly directed and edited Lifetime movie. The actors did their best but you could tell they were without proper direction. The lead woman's abilities were greater than the film, for sure. But she was working with nothing.

Benson should borrow a Narcan pen from Lovato because she's gonna need it. What a joke she's turned into. This was one of the worst films I've seen in along time. It's embarrassing that Hollywood puts out crap like this one. I might be drunk but it's because this film was so bad. There's no other way I could tolerate it. Oh the poor struggling actress who got married super young to a producer as is now 30 something and can't build her career on her own. Boo hoo. She's so bored she decides the gardener is her new best friend. She sets women back and can't hold her liquor. As a drunk, I'm deeply offended by that. Try harder.

I put this Hulu flick on at 1 in the afternoon while doing laundry and packing for an upcoming work trip. All I could think of while watching thus movie was Instagram "stories". I had just watched Shiloh Hernandez (even his name is Instagrammable!) in a movie on Tubi with the actress from Gone Girl and I Care A Lot. Like this, it too was a bad flick but that actress (I don't know her name, she never became an A-lister) is so great she elevates her films if given enough creative license to do her thing. I cannot believe how difficult it is to try and come up with six hundred characters to fill the gap. Cringe & thirsty.