Old but still gold

source: Sheena

The best thing about "Sheena" is its opening title sequence. Accompanied by an evocative musical score, a beautiful blonde girl dressed only in a sort of leather bikini rides on the back of a zebra across a dramatic African landscape. (OK, it's really a horse painted as a zebra). Unfortunately, from here on it is downhill all the way. The title character is a sort of female Tarzan, a white girl orphaned as a baby and raised by an African tribe. The plot tells how Sheena, helped by an American journalist, battles against a tyrannical ruler who has usurped power by murdering his brother. Her main asset in this struggle is her ability to communicate telepathically with animals and to persuade them to come to her assistance. This film has two things going for it. The first is Richard Hartley's music, reminiscent of Vangelis's score for "Chariots of Fire" and worthy of a much better film than this one. The second is the striking good looks of its heroine Tanya Roberts which were clearly the reason why she was cast in the part. Her acting talents, however, are striking only by their absence, although to be fair to her the same could be said of the rest of the cast. The one exception, surprisingly, is Elizabeth of Toro as the tribe's shaman responsible for Sheena's upbringing. She was a member of the Ugandan royal family, exiled by the regime of Idi Amin, who worked as both a diplomat and a model and who only made one film other than this one, but who seems more convincing than any of the professional actors on display. Trying to list all the goofs and plot holes in this film would be like shooting fish in a barrel, but would be pointless because it was clearly made as a fantasy and was never supposed to have any great connection to real life. (Although if you are going to paint a horse like a zebra, you should remember that zebras have striped manes and tails, not pure white ones as shown here). A fantasy only works, however, when we are able to suspend our disbelief, something we never manage to do here. There are some ludicrous scenes; the one where a flock of flamingos summoned by Sheena manages to bring down a helicopter is particularly noteworthy both because of its inherent unlikelihood and because of its unconvincing special effects. This is not a film we ever care about; the best that can be said for it is that it is simply an undemanding way of spending two hours. It is, however, worthwhile watching a bad film like this one from time to time, if only to increase one's appreciation of the good ones. 3/10

Roberts' undeniable gorgeousness (as an actress, she is terrible but that's irrelevant) hardly redeems this goofy turkey. This film is quite a comedown for director John Guillermin, who had directed "Death on the Nile" six years earlier.

Sheena has been entertaining us for close to 70 years now, but you sure wouldn't know it to look at her. She still looks as beautiful and sexy as ever. I've had a ball following Sheena's adventures in the pulps, comic books, on TV, and in this Sheena movie from 1984. My favorite actress in the role of Sheena is Irish McCalla, but I've enjoyed Tanya Roberts and Gina Lee Nolan too. Roberts is stunningly beautiful and she conveys a wonderful sense of innocence as Sheena. This 1984 Sheena movie is a blast of cheesy fun that provides plenty of entertaining moments that make for great escapism. Enjoy this one with good friends, beverages, and lots of popcorn. Sheena is fun!

"Sheena" has a ludicrous plot, inane dialogue, pinstripe-painted horses and the attack of the helicopter-devouring flamingos. What it also has is Tanya Roberts, clad in natural hides and very little of them. That is about all that makes the 117 minutes remotely bearable, or should I say "bare" able. Victoria Leigh Blum (aka Tanya) isn't enough to save this cheesefest, but she sure makes me want to speak chimpanzeese!

First off, PG apparently at the time allowed a brief * scene. A refreshing deal really. The violence really isn't too bad; surely of the comic variety. Not an "R" picture. Second, the movie obviously is not to be taken seriously. As harmless entertainment, it is pretty good, especially if watched in the right frame of mind. The evil countess (best line was demanding equal harm to be done to Sheena ... no ERA stuff for her!), big city reporter (reference to his view of the Towers), mystical shaman (imdb has the actress having a pretty interesting backstory), and Sheena (talk to me in words I understand!) all are fun. Commenting on Tanya Roberts' acting skills is a bit redundant. She is there because she fits into the costume, so to speak, and she does that rather well, thank you. As an actress ... well, she isn't THAT horrible, really. If Heidi Fleiss can be in a movie, TR can play Sheena! And, really, her performance adds to the fun too. I saw this at about 2am. Perfect time.

Not that bad. The production values are excellent and the story line is no worse than TV or low-budgeted action adventure. This is a PG film after all. I remembered this being marketed as a family film, however there are some very violent scenes. The shots of her swinging on a vine were very realistic as were the flamingo and rhino attacks. I was twelve when I first saw it and it was good to have a female action hero. She was very beautiful AND strong. In her early scenes she is shot sexy beautiful, but as the film progresses we see her more as healthy beautiful. I never saw earlier versions of Sheena, however no updated comic book hero movies ever match the originals (Batman, Superman, etc...) Lois Lane is forever updated to match social change, why can't Sheena become more politically correct when it comes to not wearing fur? I think Tanya Roberts has gotten a bum rap over the years. Besides being so beautiful, she has a certain charm and sweetness to her. The hauntingly beautiful theme song is one of the best of any movie. The final shot of Tanya Roberts, a reprise of her first shot, galloping on a zebra along an endless beach of flamingos in the background is breathtaking and worth the rental.

This is another film I recall being released in my childhood but have taken over twenty years to catch up with – not that it was a priority for me, knowing of its dismal reputation (SHEENA having been a nominee of five Razzies back in the day); that said, having just watched the even more maligned TARZAN, THE APE MAN (1981), I thought I might as well get to that jungle character’s female counterpart (who originated in a comic-strip)... The result is perhaps even worse than the notorious John Derek film: if anything, the fact that the character is a household name makes the Tarzan outing a more desirable commodity – besides, even if Tanya Roberts as Sheena does get a couple of gratuitous * bathing scenes, she’s not really a match for Bo Derek’s Jane! Furthermore, the plot doesn’t exactly compel attention: the ambitious younger sibling of the current African ruler covets both his throne and his intended bride (whose model-type body is also conveniently bared for our perusal) and has him killed – at the same time, contriving to frame the visiting female shaman of an ancient jungle tribe for the deed! The latter is jailed, but she’s apparently able to communicate telepathically with Sheena (who promptly sets out to rescue her); the scantily-clad, tree-hopping jungle-girl was raised by the shaman ever since the childhood trauma of watching her explorer parents die in a cave-in; the young woman’s gift also allows her to talk to the animals (apparently, all that’s needed is to rub one’s forehead...only it looks more as if the subject’s suffering from migraines!) and, on many an occasion during the course of the film, they come to her aid. Also involved in the narrative are wimpish reporter Ted Wass (who eventually teams up with – and falls for – Sheena), his comic-relief cameraman, and a band of mercenaries in the new king’s employ (unrealistically, he and his bride tag along to their ultimate regret) who sets out in pursuit of our heroes because Wass has unwittingly filmed the assassination. The film is not unwatchable per se, but it’s not very rewarding either outside of some undeniable campiness – despite the involvement of interesting talent behind the camera: director Guillermin, for one, wasn’t new to the jungle habitat – having directed a couple of the 1960s Tarzan films, SHAFT IN Africa (1973), and the 1976 version of KING KONG (with its lamentable 1986 sequel following SHEENA itself)!; story and (bad) script come courtesy of David Newman (the SUPERMAN films), Leslie Stevens (THE OUTER LIMITS TV series) and Lorenzo Semple Jr. (the 1960s BATMAN), cinematography is by Oscar-winning Pasqualino De Santis (ROMEO AND JULIET [1968]) and the editor is Ray Lovejoy (2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY [1968]); still, perhaps the worst offender is Richard Hartley’s unsuitable score – with a main theme shamelessly redolent of Vangelis’ celebrated music for CHARIOTS OF FIRE (1981)!

Sheena wasn't made to win any Academy awards. Nevertheless, for a "B" film the photography is actually quite good. Granted, Tanya's acting ability at this time in her life needed a lot of work. I'm sure the producers knew this going in and didn't care. They knew the attraction would be to watch Sheena doing her thing in her jungle outfit. Tanya was the perfect choice considering the reason for the film. Sheena was made to showcase Tanya Roberts stunning physical attributes and was successful in this regard. She is the reason the movie is still moderately popular after 20 years. So if you like this type of eye-candy film, enjoy! It wasn't meant to be anything else.