Trailer—Wake for Galileo

source: Wake for Galileo

Quite possibly one of the worst 30 minute experiences of my life. This purported top original movie was 30 minutes (all i should stand) of old NASA footage with cheesy music in the background. Of course their was the paranoid "alien" making a few complaints and attempting an incoherent story But in reality the was a poor attempt at originality and a ripoff of old NASA footage. Put me to sleep! Do Not Waste Your Time

Well, you know you make friends and any good friend you don't abandon, no matter what. We get old, things change. We relax into what we still imagine is risky adventure. And in friends we don't point out the reality that what might have been important then, isn't now. Herzog is a friend, a good one. I've trusted him in the past and when he's let me down it has been honorably. So I'll come to anything he makes, even though I know sometimes I'll have to make excuses for him. And that's what I have to do here, apologize, justify. When Herzog approaches a project, you can see that it has only one conceptual thrust. Just one. That's been fine for me because he takes that one idea — whatever it is — to such extremes with such honesty and commitment it blossoms into levels that resonate. The idea here is similar to one he has explored before: the images don't matter, anything can be used, even stock images. The story doesn't matter at all; any tripe can suffice, the more generic the better. There need be no point, no message, no root into your soul, or the group soul. All we need is aeolian sound, edited in a way that corresponds in an obvious way with splashes of color. Its the rhythm of the thing, established aurally and only then visually, with the visual pace lagging. Its a way of letting us know that anyone who does this can impart religion of any content. Throughout is a supposedly wised up guy constantly reminding us that he could have told us so. Ted's Evaluation -- 3 of 3: Worth watching.

I can tolerate much and am much more tolerable than almost anyone i know but i couldn't sit through this... whatever it is. I only made it through about 30-45 minutes before i got distracted by the more interesting ticking of my clock. The opening scene dialog with Brad Dourif was quite funny though my laughter and the rolling of my eyes probably more resembled someone in a straight jacket bouncing around a padded room. If the movie were nothing but Brad conflagulating around i probably could've sat through it with some help from illegal substances but the stock video from Nasa (available for download i'm sure) and Jacques Cousteau scuba footage with narration and music tracks superimposed over resembled a poorly cobbled together grade school project. Perhaps the movie got better but i'm sorry i just couldn't force my attention. I could've easier tolerated a faucet dripping on my forehead for a week. Perhaps this movie was a comment on film-making?

The only possible reason why anyone would ever watch this god-awful "movie" is because Herzog's name is on it. It's around 1 hour 15 minutes of off-the-shelf NASA stock footage - which anyone can download off the internet - along with exerts from some interviews of half-baked, dreamy-eyed scientist talking about outlandish theories that may or may not be feasible in about 5000 years. And these interviews, I'm sure, are not meant for this production either, but simply lectures from some Discovery Channel science program. Add to that, an utterly annoying soundtrack of Nazi-era German soprano/opera, and some tribal folk music - all mixed at levels that make you cringe - and you have a recipe for agony. Then you have the ridiculous narrative, or "story". Now, I like Brad Dourif as much as the next guy. Actually I think he's a great actor, and the total failure of this "movie" is certainly not his fault. But the narrative that he is forced to act out is really far, far beyond silly. I mean, take "Invasion of the body snatchers" times "Independence Day" powered by "The Wizard of Oz", and you'll still have a story that is more believable than this thing! So to summarize; Take about bunch of stock footage off the internet, edit it together in no particular order, add some exerts of interviews with some NASA eggheads that you found on Discovery, slap on the most annoying music you can find, and then hire an actor to narrate a "space story", which has nothing to do with the images or footage that you are seeing - and then you'll have this movie. I guess Herzog was running behind on his mortgage and asked himself "what can I come up with before the end of the week?". Well, this is it! You have been warned.

I respect Herzog and like how he goes in strange directions, but with that sometimes he wanders down the wrong path, or maybe wrong isn't the word. He sometimes wanders down a boring path. Somehow Herzog got his hands on some space footage and some antarctic underwater footage and thought he could compose that into a sci fi movie. This is of course a visually distinctive journey and a must for all die hard Herzog fans, but I felt it was a bit too strange and far out. Brad Dourif plays an alien on earth who says he sucks at what he does or something along those lines, which is kind of funny. Maybe you have to be in the right atmosphere to enjoy this journey, but if you are only going to see one Herzog film, don't make it this one.

What makes Herzog mind numbingly talented is his eye for absolute heart stopping beauty and shocking humor all in a shot. For this I never tire of watching Herzog's films over and over again. In Into the Wild Blue Yonder he again encompasses the genius and silliness of humankind and nature. He allows your eyes to wander long all around in his shots, gracefully to take their time in childlike wonder. It's a slow food movie. He trusts that you have a sense to enjoy all the irony, possible melancholy, waltz- like fluid motion, transfixing colors, the plain goofiness without feeling you must be a "film snob. A delight for the eyes to be sure! Choosing Brad Dourif for his punctuated passionate alien was perfect! As an actor he is always fascinating to behold. In "Into the wild... " as much so as the underwater scenery. Herzog will always be my favorite director for his open invitation to every viewer to take what they might from his films.

"Astronauts in Shorts" might be a better title for this tedious, pretentious crap. Herzog's intention was to show us that we need to start looking after our planet. That intention is not on the screen. What is on the screen is meaningless NASA footage of astronauts in a weightless environment going about their everyday chores while in space. Brad Dourif appears occasionally as a visitor from Alpha Centauri who came to Earth long ago and built a ghost town and shopping mall that went bust. He admits that his people "sucked" at colonization. Dourif, as the alien, is really good. Musician Henry Kaiser provides some amazing footage shot below the Antarctic icecap. There is too much of it, but it is beautiful. Herzog had nothing to do with its creation, as he had nothing to do with the space footage, either, so the fact that he recently got a golden gong for this turgid nonsense at the Venice Film Festival just shows what a bunch of pretentious tossers they are. The film is not any kind of "return to form" for Herzog and it's not "important" or "a work of genius", either. It's found footage loosely held together by Brad Dourif's entertaining, funny rantings. And at 82 minutes, it is three times longer than it has any right to be.

I have to admit that my family and I only made it through about 25 minutes before we decided to try and salvage the rest of the evening (and turned it off). The photography was not remarkable by any stretch of the imagination (at least in the first 25 minutes). We are very open minded about movies and this one was a real stinker. It was kookie...but not in a good way....kind of in a pathetic way... like trying to have a conversation with a paranoid schizophrenic. I really wish I had something positive to say but I don't. I feel like warning people to not waste their time. It is possible that the movie did a complete turnaround later (after 25 minutes). I haven't actually turned a movie off like this for many years.